Welcome to the Flirting Styles Inventory!

The Five Flirting Styles book jacket

There are many ways that people communicate romantic interest. After indicating your level of agreement with the following statements, you will receive your own personalized flirting styles report! This report compares your flirting styles against others the same age and sex as you.

Before starting, it is best to try to imagine yourself as a single person. Imagine how you would respond to these statements at those very first stages of meeting someone new. This will be easy if you are currently single. If you are in a relationship, think about how you would have answered when you were single. Try to think about how you felt on your first date or when you first met your current partner.

The five flirting styles was developed for cis-gender, heterosexual individuals. We acknowledge that these options limit the ways people can identify their own gender. Our research suggests the FSI applies to bisexual individuals. Research on diverse gender identities and sexual orientations is underway.
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1. Making a real connection with others can be exciting
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
2. I am good at showing my sexual interest
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
3. Men should pursue women, not the other way around
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
4. Flirting is just for fun, people don't need to be so serious
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
5. Being too physically forward can be a turnoff
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
6. I really enjoy learning about another person's interest
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
7. I am good at picking up on the sexual interest of others
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
8. Men should make the first move
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
9. Flirting can be harmless fun
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
10. People should be cautious when letting someone know they are interested
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
11. I really look for an emotional connection with someone I'm interested in
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
12. I am good at using body language to flirt
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
13. Despite how our society is changing, it is still up to a man to take control in initiating relationships
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
14. The primary reason I flirt is because it makes me feel good about myself
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
15. It is important not to say something overly sexual when showing interest
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
16. I love a well-placed compliment from the opposite sex
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
17. I have no problem letting others know I am interested in them
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
18. A woman assertively pursuing a man is fine with me
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
19. I flirt with people I have absolutely no interest in
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
20. When dating, people should always be polite and use proper manners
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
21. Showing sincere interest is the best way to let someone know you are interested in them
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
22. I always let the opposite sex know when I am sexually interested in them
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
23. It doesn't matter who makes the first move, as long as it happens
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
24. There are rules about how men and women should conduct themselves
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
25. I wish that we could go back to a time where formal dating was the norm
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
26. In today's society people have to be careful about flirting
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
27. When I flirt with somebody, making an emotional connection is not on my mind
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
28. Flirting with others makes me feel more attractive
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
29. A person should not say crude things when showing romantic interest
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree
30. I'd prefer to date someone who is slower paced than someone who is sexually aggressive
Strongly Disagree
Strongly Agree

Each pair of words describes a person’s way of communicating attraction on a continuum. If you see yourself as more 'Aggressive' than 'Passive' when you communicate attraction you would fill in a circle that is closer to the word 'Aggressive'. Try to think of your overall way of communicating attraction for each of these paired words and fill in the circle that corresponds with how you do it.

When I communicate attraction, I am...

Sexually Assertive
Not Sexually Assertive
Aggressive
Passive
Playful
Serious
Very Polite
Crude
Affectionate
Not Affectionate
Interested Acting
Dismissive Acting
Warm
Cold
Friendly
Aloof
Careful
Carefree
Using Traditional Manners
Not Using Traditional Manners